Trying to find answers!!!……Its all me at Grey cells ……. Unfinished thoughts

The Secret of Happiness – Said a friend

Posted in Belief, Great thinking, Insecurity!, Introspection, life, Love, me, Thoughts by nagaje on October 6, 2010

The Secret of Happiness The secret of happiness is to be free of fear. Fear is like a toxin that runs through much of our thinking. It feeds on insecurity, feeling of loss, loneliness, inadequacy and attachment.

You are loveable and loving. Accept this as Truth. Appreciate and care for yourself – truly, deeply, intensely, in a way that reflects your real value. Then you will automatically have the same regards for all other living beings and things.



Dating a Married woman!! don’t say you were not warned!!

Posted in Divorce !!!, Friend !!!, Insecurity!, Journey, life, Losing..Love!, Love, Marriage, Men, Relation, Woman by nagaje on May 6, 2010

For the man that is looking for a married woman to have some fun with, he needs to be careful.  He may find himself involved with a woman he only wants to have fun with, and end up with so much more. Or, he may end up falling in love with a woman who will always love another man.

 Married women are looking for something to spice up their lives.  They have fallen into the rut of the day to day regime of their marriages, and are bored, neglected, lacking a sex life, seeking thrills, Or she’s just plain lonely and needs to be held, which often leading to intimacy and an affair.

 And then there’s the woman who knows she’s being cheated upon and in her hurt and anger she feels it’s payback time. And so decides to hit back in the same measure.

 If a man can steal another woman away from her husband, even if it’s only for a few hours, he will have felt like he conquered a battle.  And for a man, there is no greater reward.

 Women on the other hand are lacking emotional bonds and are looking for someone that will make them feel pretty, loved, adored, and worshipped even.

 Men will seek out any relationship, married or otherwise, with the initial intent of biological release.  They will connect with women they have chemistry with, are attracted to, and ultimately, want a sexual affair with.  For some men, these relationships evolve into an emotional bond over time. 

 For women however, the emotions come first, the sex comes second.

 Married women that are cheating simply are not clear on what they want, and so they will tell the man exactly what they want to hear. Why? Because women are experts at knowing what men want emotionally, and will give them exactly that, every time, until it is too late.

 You be honest to yourself and your wife before anything happens. You took a vow to love honour and cherish. It sounds like you didn’t understand some of that. Falling in love with someone while you are in a committed relationship only points to one thing and that is that your not committed enough.

 Dating a married woman will open up a can of worms for you is an emotional understatement

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Love – a new perspective

Posted in Losing..Love!, Love, Thoughts by nagaje on February 25, 2010

A man was polishing his new car.
His 4year old son picked up a stone and scratched on the side of the car.
In anger, the furious Man took his child’s hand & hit it many times,
not realizing he was using a wrench.
At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures.

When the child saw his father, with painful eyes he asked
‘Dad when will my fingers grow back?’
The man was so hurt and speechless.
He went back to the car and kicked it many times.
Devastated by his own actions, sitting in front of the car he looked at the scratches,

 His son had written ‘LOVE YOU DAD’.Next day that man committed suicide.

Remember, Anger and Love has no limits…

Always remember…. .
Things are to be used and people are to be loved”

But the problem in today’s world is….
“People are being USED & Things are being LOVED”

Its Difficult — But True!!

Posted in Belief, Communication, Expectation, Giving back, Great thinking, Introspection, Love, Thoughts by nagaje on December 2, 2009

“Apologizing does not mean that you are wrong and the other one is right…It simply means that you value the relationship much more than your ego …”

So Go on… Say ” Sorry” … You gain & that means a lot to you!!


Restore Positive energy in You

Posted in Get Set GO!!, Great thinking, life, Love, Thoughts, Uncategorized by nagaje on October 20, 2009

Self healing is the process to restoring Positive energy balance, Especially on days when you feel overwhelmed by multiple demands on your time, or when you feel drained by people and places .

Here are a few  simple tips which help boosting Positive energy:

A Quick-fix  especially for demanding days. Take 10 Deep Breaths. Make them as slow and deep as you can.  Do it as often as you like, anywhere and anytime. Everytime you exhale,  feel your body relaxing further.

Feel the earth beneath your feet …  If you can walk barefoot in the garden or the park, it would be great.

Rub your palms together and feel the vibrations. Gently place them over your closed eyes. for few seconds as long as you feel the warmth.

 Affirmations work very well to raise our energy and to promote feelings of self confidence and joy.

Add a few tablespoons of sea salt or common salt to your bath water. Its another simple technique to pep your tingling sensations on Skin.

Wear white or pastel coloured clothes. They  resonate at a higher frequency They give a serene feeling.

Above all….. Be Positive. .. Feel Positive … Life’s very Short after all to Fill in Negative thoughts.




Detachment !! Love more ??

Posted in Belief, Expectation, Great thinking, life, Love, Relation, Thoughts by nagaje on August 31, 2009
Detachment—like love, it’s a state of being …Detachment is about the soul leaving everything behind and ‘journeying’ to its Lord.
One of the reasons I took to the concept of detachment like a duck to water was that I was compelled by the argument that,

When you  are in love—with a person or a thing—is that it becomes the centre of our inner universe. .Over a period of time that person’s  world began to stop revolving around you. This causes friction because that person  will  still the centre of your universe.  Its an universal phenomenon In some way or other, it will change. You are sure to get into depression, you become desperate you feel like running away from everything .. Irony of the tragedy is that you know that is not the answer and is not possible.

Now take a different look at the situation.. nothing will ever change because you want it to change. You need to change …….. nothing in the world asked you to make a person center of our universe that is today making you desolate. Set yourself free… in fact set the person free rather than placing him/ her in the center of your universe binding or compelling them to be there.

Your identity will change your outlook will change the same person can become everything of your life now without confining to the space of your universe. you now become two independent but vastly interconnected people 🙂

There is a saying  “Live free of love, for its very peace is anguish; Its beginning is pain, its end is death.”


Thus  detachment is freedom. Freedom from the bonds of deluding and unrealistic expectations in relationships. To be detached is to let go, of that  anxiety-driven desperation demolishes you frantically want to preserve.

One should enjoy the beauty relationship without being caught in its possessive grasp. Possessiveness is a poison : whereas detachment lets you stand by yourself & still be an integral part  relationship.
It is more about giving space & having your own to explore. By being detached we can get out of that prison if false sense of protection and enjoy the limitless avenue that you can be proud of and soar into unbound horizon . Detachment by itself does not mean separation its just that its more care , faith & courage to an enriched wholesome relation.
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Hoarding??? Let Go!!….. Where..?? You should know!!

Posted in life, Love, Relation, That's me, Thoughts by nagaje on October 26, 2008


Sunday…..Busy clutter cleaning time…..with time paucity… I was all hands.. all over my cupboard….my desk…. everywhere ……. THEN … I only heard the clink  ….. and yeah…. my room was strewn over by those shining crystal pieces… small ones tinkling whenever the light fell on them… I could even see the red piece …  that was once a crystal heart …..

 Wondering what  I am getting at ?? … Yeah… I had this crystal angel with the red heart in its hands falling off my book rack….. and …. was broken into pieces  … I was aghast ….. at the sight of it  ….. OR was I really ???

Let me think about it …….. I got this quaint little  piece four years back on my Birthday [ You know friends they will try to impress you with anything ].. … … I did not know where to keep it …… finally it found its way on the top of my book rack along with all those little things that share the same space…… Oh …. believe me I have so many such pieces all around my sweet little room… in fact my room is my home… so  you can imagine its a small museum by itself !!!hmmmm …. with me as the Masterpiece 😉  ….

You find so many such things in my room… an old ticket to park… a  chocolate wrapper  … a movie ticket …. a parking ticket  … small hotel bill  …..  bus ticket …  you name it …. I have all of them … my sweet little souvenir’s … sounds familiar  ???  Welcome to the Fraternity…. of… HOARDERS….. he he We hoard them all …. not knowing where they will be used … and just not getting to trash them …..

Well ….. If I think hard …. I am rather more than happy to clean the whole thing ……. Come to think of it …… most of us keep all those unnecessary old things and never find a reason to throw them …. we keep hoarding them …….  We all do ….. We fail to realise …… actually  hoarding– is against our own prosperity  …… I have also heard that  whatever that can be replaced with money should never be regretted ….

Apparently …… Letting  go is not only for the material stuff … but for the feelings and  Relationships as well .. I guess that’s where the never-say-die attitude of an average Indian comes to help….. Being able to shrug off and Move on …… U Know …… Let Go …… One can not sit and worry endlessly  about what can not be helped or replaced …… 

So long as one keeps thinking of old love ….. old relationship ….. harbouring  any kind of feelings of …… resentment … hatred …. memoirs …. reproaches …. sadness …. its going to be very difficult to pave way to a new relationship…. If at all one needs to forge a new relationship … one has to create that void… that need …. to have a new one and it is just not possible … until you let go ….. create that space for the new ……..

Not everybody wants to voluntarily part with ……  may have to forcibly part with people …  What becomes more important is that we need to learn from our past relations ….. we need to understand our own mistakes  rather than worrying about the wrong that happened …. and move on to having better outlook on Life ….. Love….  being more positive ….  more dynamic …. that way it becomes easy to form a new equation with a different new person……..

Thus for life to give that  second , fresh , another chance to Love ….. allow love to enter your life , create that empty space  …. . and that is possible only when you LET GO  ……….

Yeah I know ……. having said all that … its just not easy ……..  needs lot of self drive ….. Lot of Support ….  Motivation from around us…. and yeah double yeah…….. Lucky are those who have all the support they need to wade through …….


You know what ……. When the going gets tough…….. The tough gets going…. isn’t ?? ”

Cheeni Kum is Definitely NOT Sugarless…!!!!!

Posted in Bolly wood, Love, Movie through my eyes by nagaje on November 26, 2007

Hey I saw!!! Cheeni Kum.. was long awaited movie for me in Television 😦

as I could not get to Multiplex when it was shown all around town.. I would not say I was busy..

I was expecting another Nishabd … but this was a beatiful concept so close to reality … I never knew when the movie got over….


Believe me it was Truly , Amazingly refreshing …… Though all the music Tracks are with some previous references from Kannada / Tamil [ after all Ileyaraja.. has done the score] .. they are still fresh and nice…

N balakrishna has done the best Directing though some initial pieces of movie gets repetitive… but you fail to notice it… Thanks to the Cream of Bollywood stars… The BIG B and Suave Tabu….Brilliance is the only word that can explain the dazzaling performence…. and expressions…. Dilogues were brilliant

 I started to dream my own 64 throughout the movie…..

Movie has a great mix of chracterisation…. An ‘Budda’deb .[Amitabh] who is so…strict…who gets angry.. who reacts.. so opposite to the name….

An Cute little Independent Nina [Tabu].. who can be so.delicate.. charming…

An 85 yr old Mother [ Zohra] who lives lif as though it started yesterday…

An sweet little sexy[ Swini] who could give you complex by her thoughts…

A retired disciplined….Gandhian…. Mr.Verma [ Paresh] who loves Bhojan… Bhajan.. Baaji[ Har bhajan singh].. Loves Chicken … and Lords.. for Cricket

Friends of Mr.Verma.. who enjoy Tea & Buiscuit … on his Dharna[Sathyagraha]

Awesome mix of characters….

Best Part of the movie is ……. Though it is said to be British setting all happened in Our local studio… &  Old little darling Zohra could even remember her c0-stars dilogues at that age.. Kudos….

It was a Nice way to end my hectic weekend  ……


Friend!! Not in my words again …

Posted in Friend !!!, Great thinking, Love, Thoughts by nagaje on September 6, 2007

 A friend …… the meaning anybody can understand!! …… But how many of us can live up to it??

Check it up .. yourself!! ………………. Here it goes!!

I can’t give solutions to all of life’s problems, doubts,

or fears. But I can listen to you, and together we will

search for answers.

I can’t change your past with all it’s heartache and pain,

nor the future with its untold stories.

But I can be there now when you need me to care.

I can’t keep your feet from stumbling.

I can only offer my hand that you may grasp it and not fall.

Your joys, triumphs, successes, and happiness are not mine;

Yet I can share in your laughter.

Your decisions in life are not mine to make, nor to judge;

I can only support you, encourage you,

and help you when you ask.

I can’t prevent you from falling away from friendship,

from your values, from me.

I can only pray for you, talk to you and wait for you.

I can’t give you boundaries which I have determined for you,

But I can give you the room to change, room to grow,

room to be yourself.

I can’t keep your heart from breaking and hurting,

But I can cry with you and help you pick up the pieces

and put them back in place.

I can’t tell you who you are.

I can only love you and be your friend. 

Can marriages survive infidelity?? One that is history too!!

Posted in Communication, Insecurity!, life, Love, Marriage, Men, Woman by nagaje on August 7, 2007

People marry for various reasons … But can the marriage strengthen the realtionship or does it provide an platform to dig into the human nature of the partners or even the past to draw a curtain ……..on existing good  Life! …… Sad! Yeah….

Its always right for a girl to confess that she was having affair before wedding they feel that they are being angels of honesty in the act… but on the same score can they really accept the fact that even men could have had affirs? in the same past..

More so bcoz for a man affair is an impule buy… an easy sexual oppurtunity too good to pass up.. a woman may weigh the consequences .. thus a confesssion of infidelity can be a too scary .. it can bring the devil out of a wife .. as she feels the infidelity is a kind of rejection to them..only!!

Most of the times straying out of marriage need not be for sex .. or  wife… It can be her nagging sense of insecurity.. and constant appeal for assuring the love is always there ..can get stiffling too.. Ironically most of the couples have accepted the fact that the heated arguments always end up in passionate Sex.. but it can stimulate lot of withdrawal symptoms .. 

Though men  do not look around for any newer pastures….. you end up being nice to a listening ear , compassionate person.. who gives what men always want .. admiration.. to  everything they do!!.. good ..intelligent.. great in bed.. nice company .. are all the well accepted norms  a man would want to hear….  All this without an ounce of commitment…… for any kind of relation..but believe me they get it too.. loads of them 😦

All they can end up saying is  ” I got Carried away!! ”  “I was trying to runaway from an imaginary problem to end up here!! ”  Nice to hear ??.. Men are too good at saying …….. ‘ why can’t she see I need her??”………. I come home to Good Hug and Hot meal.. Followed by hot meat 😉 ….. I do not want to change my lifestyle for her…….. I feel my life’s getting slotted into hers.. Common quotes??? Huh??…………….. “Men need to be applauded for what they’re bringing to the relationship, whether it’s sexually, romantically or financially,”

 “Often affairs are the angry response of the person not getting what he legitimately wants and needs from the marriage and feeling as if his partner just refused to give it,”……. How can we solve it???Big question??

Simple answer BeOpen .. Be honest… Ask … Don’t assume.. Be compassionate.. try and understand… give it Time.. and more so do not hate!!!