Trying to find answers!!!……Its all me at Grey cells ……. Unfinished thoughts

Who stopped your growth????

Always concentrate on present, ignore the past says -Anupam uncle

Posted in Belief, Dreams, Expectation, Get Set GO!!, Great thinking, Hope, Journey, life by nagaje on July 12, 2010

Always concentrate on present, ignore the past One of the main causes of unhappiness is that most of us choose to dwell, or daydream, about the past or the future. We do not wish to live in the present and leverage the most from it. We largely tend to look back on incidents that shaped our lives, most of it in a negative way, and constantly say to ourselves, “What if it had happened this way….?”

If we are not romanticising the past, we are trying to blame others for the way things eventually happened. I have come across so many people who have failed to accept the past; whether it is in terms of broken relationships or lost fortunes.

Unfortunately, none of them could do much about their present because their past always intruded. Depression finds an easy dwelling in the minds of such people. And then things go downhill.

Please remember that the past cannot be changed and the future is uncertain. All that we have is the present. And it is the present that can help us change the future. So the point of it all is to make the most of every moment that is available to us by applying ourselves in a focused manner in the present time. And how does one achieve such concentration? By meditation. I have briefly written about meditation in my tenth column, but I did not elaborate as there is enough literature available.

Yet, the one aspect that escapes many of us is that meditation is not just a calming exercise to be practised in sessions. Meditation is essentially about being conscious of every action that we do in our every wakeful moment. In other words, meditation is about living the moment.

One of the finest sayings I have heard, and whose origin has not been established, goes, “Life is not about surviving the storm, but of dancing in the rain.” In living each moment, we should experience sadness in sad times and happiness in happy times.

Living is not about trying to escape any experience; it is to live through it. For example, we cannot escape childhood and rush to adulthood; it is important to be a child and live through fears, animosities and yes, daydreams. I can tell you from experience that child celebrities who have not had a normal childhood have always felt that they lost out on their innocent years.

So if you are writing, as I am at this moment, immerse yourself in writing. If you are dancing, lose yourself in the dance. And if it is raining, as it might since this is the monsoon season, go out and enjoy the rain. Live and enjoy each moment as if it was your last.

There is an adage in English that if you look after the pennies, the pounds will look after themselves. In a similar vein, I believe that if we look after the moments, our lifetime will look after itself.

This is Write up by  Anupam Kher a renowned film and theatre actor.

No wonder now is called  Present – a’ Gift’

Cherioooooooooooo……………………………….

Dating a Married woman!! don’t say you were not warned!!

Posted in Divorce !!!, Friend !!!, Insecurity!, Journey, life, Losing..Love!, Love, Marriage, Men, Relation, Woman by nagaje on May 6, 2010

For the man that is looking for a married woman to have some fun with, he needs to be careful.  He may find himself involved with a woman he only wants to have fun with, and end up with so much more. Or, he may end up falling in love with a woman who will always love another man.

 Married women are looking for something to spice up their lives.  They have fallen into the rut of the day to day regime of their marriages, and are bored, neglected, lacking a sex life, seeking thrills, Or she’s just plain lonely and needs to be held, which often leading to intimacy and an affair.

 And then there’s the woman who knows she’s being cheated upon and in her hurt and anger she feels it’s payback time. And so decides to hit back in the same measure.

 If a man can steal another woman away from her husband, even if it’s only for a few hours, he will have felt like he conquered a battle.  And for a man, there is no greater reward.

 Women on the other hand are lacking emotional bonds and are looking for someone that will make them feel pretty, loved, adored, and worshipped even.

 Men will seek out any relationship, married or otherwise, with the initial intent of biological release.  They will connect with women they have chemistry with, are attracted to, and ultimately, want a sexual affair with.  For some men, these relationships evolve into an emotional bond over time. 

 For women however, the emotions come first, the sex comes second.

 Married women that are cheating simply are not clear on what they want, and so they will tell the man exactly what they want to hear. Why? Because women are experts at knowing what men want emotionally, and will give them exactly that, every time, until it is too late.

 You be honest to yourself and your wife before anything happens. You took a vow to love honour and cherish. It sounds like you didn’t understand some of that. Falling in love with someone while you are in a committed relationship only points to one thing and that is that your not committed enough.

 Dating a married woman will open up a can of worms for you is an emotional understatement

Tagged with:

Marriage !!??!!

Posted in Great thinking, Insecurity!, Introspection, Journey, life, Marriage, Uncategorized by nagaje on April 30, 2010

🙂  I thought I understood marriage!! But world is so full of people with better insights ..

Here is one article that made me sigh and say …. ” oh yeah ….  you are so right indeed ”   A Turbulance Called Marriage

Cheers…..

Pity on self????

Posted in Belief, Insecurity!, Introspection, Journey by nagaje on April 30, 2010

Sob story  

A tale of personal hardship or misfortune intended to arouse pity & A maudlin plea given as an explanation or a rationalization.

Self-pity

 Psychological state of mind of an individual in perceived adverse situations who has not accepted the situation and does not have the confidence or ability to cope with it. It is characterized by a person’s belief that he or she is the victim of events and is therefore deserving of condolence. Self-pity is generally regarded as a negative emotion in that it does not generally help deal with adverse situations. However, in a social context, it may result in either the offering of sympathy or advice.

 People who wallow in Self pity  & go on with Sob stories to attain any ulterior motive….. Like extortion of money [ Small amounts may be ] &  Sex and the likes!!!

 The dynamics of self-less ness and altruism verses selfishness and lust get challenged in a pity-sex dynamic since sex is inherently selfish. Sex is just two people getting off on each other like animals and satisfying their lusts. I don’t see anything wrong with charity and altruism or with someone helping someone in general — so when that gets combined with lust and sex — it’s like I’m seeing a chemical explosion here or something!!!

 If at all anyone needs to help a person….Help them to understand their strength… Help them to understand their capacity… help them to come out of their state… Like…. “ Teaching to FISH “  But guess what we are good at giving Fish for a day!! And let the guy stay in his pit of pity…. I guess that kinda gives an upper hand and feeling of superiority!!

Not sure……………. just a wandering thought!!

Are you agitated – Calm your mind….

Posted in Belief, Expectation, Great thinking, Journey, life, Thoughts by nagaje on December 15, 2009

Once Buddha was walking from one town to another town with a few of his followers. While they were traveling, they happened to pass a lake. They stopped there and Buddha told one of his disciples, “I am thirsty. Do get me some water from that lake there.  The disciple walked up to the lake.

When he reached it, he noticed that right at that moment, a bullock cart started crossing through the lake.As a result, the water became very muddy, very turbid. The disciple thought, “How can I give this muddy water to Buddha to drink!”  

So he came back and told Buddha, “The water in there is very muddy. I don’t think it is fit to drink.” After about half an hour, again  Buddha asked the same disciple to go back to the lake and get him some water to drink.

The disciple obediently went back to the lake.  This time too he found that the lake was muddy. He returned and informed Buddha about the same.

After sometime, again Buddha asked the same disciple to go back.The disciple reached the lake to find the lake absolutely clean and clear with pure water in it. The mud had settled down and the water above it looked fit to be had. So he collected some water in a pot and brought it to Buddha.

Buddha looked at the water, and then he looked up at the disciple and said,” See what you did to make the water clean. You let it be…. and the mud settled down on its own – and you got clear water.  Your mind is also like that! When it is disturbed, just let it be.

Give it a little time. It will settle down on its own. You don’t have to put in any effort to calm it down. It will happen. It is effortless.

He said, “It is effortless.”  Having ‘Peace of Mind’ is not a strenuous job; it is an effortless process!

 
You need not bother OR get angry on the cause of disturbance OR show your agitation on anything else Or do anything about it at all….. Just acknowledge and LET it BE.

It will be EFFORTLESS !! 

Cheeeriooo

Lost In Bangalore?? – Get directions!!

Posted in bangalore, bengaluru, Communication, Journey, Tour by nagaje on October 30, 2009

Lost In Bangalore?

Don’t worry now!!!

🙂

You are just an SMS away!!

There is an SMS-based location search and direction finding service that provides directions to people with or without Smart phones to any location in Bangalore.

SMS  the place  you are looking for to 9008890088

Example 1: FROM Mekri circle TO ESI Hospital
Example 2: INOX
Example 3: SBI atm NEAR M G Road

You will get a reply SMS with the exact location and the shortest directions to reach the place from a prominent landmark.

Standard SMS rates as per your plan apply

Fatehpur……….. A city of Akbar era…. Enchanting……..

Posted in India, Journey, Places, Tour, World by nagaje on January 4, 2008

My this visit to Delhi was Eventfulllllllllllll…….. More so because of one young guide in Fatehpur …… He was passionate about the whole place having done the same work for 11 years in row.. Younus has never been out of Fatehpur Sikri….

Younus made my visit to Fatehpur …….. a endearing memoir which I would want to relive…….Anyday… .. I made the journey more remarkable by bringing back home memorabilia that was precious…..

Once a small village, Fatehpur Sikri holds a fascinating tale behind its being the capital of Mughal Emperor Akbar. As the legend goes, Akbar, who had no son, decided to seek the blessings of Saint Shaikh Salim  who used to live in the village, Sikri.

The saint prophesied that Akbar would have  son within three years and soon the saint’s foretelling came true and Akbar saw the face of his first son Salim, from his Hindu wife Jodha Bai … the princess of Amber [ Jodhabai’s Palace is befittingly the grandest of all palaces in Fatehpur Sikri ]  She was his most favoured wife and the mother of the crown prince ,whom he named after the saint.

Akbar was so glad that he decided to build his new capital near Sikri where the saint lived in a humble hermitage. and he renamed it Fatehabad (later it became Fatehpur) meaning ‘City of Victory’.

One of the first constructins begun in1951 was the Friday Mosque / Jama Masjid also called Dargah Mosque said to be a replica of main mosque in Mecca….. with Persian & Hindu architectural designs largest of  its kind in India at the time, measuring 168 metres by 144, with a huge inner courtyard.

 buland.jpg

The Buland Darwaza / Gate of Victory or ‘Sublime Gateway’ is the main Entrance,  was added later to commemorate Akbar’s military conquest of Gujarat. The gateway, which rises to a height of 45 metres, presents an awesome spectacle of isolation, and has exquisite Persian calligraphy inscribed on it.  It says, “ The world is a bridge. Pass over it but build no house upon it, for whoever hopes for one hour, hopes for all eternity. The world is one hour. Spend it in prayer, for the rest is unseen”. No more eloquent epitaph to the Mughal Empire .

Just out side this gateway  is a deep well where the present day  guides and daredevils leap from the top of the entrance in to water just to make a living….

Inside the courtyard there is tomb of Sheikh Salim Chisti. … which was earlier constructed with red stone first and was late replaced by Marble … with beautiful hand carved lattice screens / ‘ jalis’  /  tracery …. which are simply awesome.

Total courtyard is bordered by so many rooms earlier used by royal guests / guards .. now few of them are being used for  ” Madrasa  ” for the poor.

From this place you can also view A Barbed Pillar tht is built in the memory of Akbar’s pet Elephant  Hiran… which traditionally was used to crush the head of guilty . It is also said that if the elephant disobeyed the order thrice the victim was Freed !!!

But the brief glory of Fatehpur Sikri came to an end when Akbar left Sikri and shifted to Lahore to escape the water scarcity in Fatehpur. The abandoned city then slowly started to see the signs of negligence and never regained its lost glory again. But history never forgot the city and now it is one of the most visited tourist destination and is now one of the World Heritage Site in India

 Though the story does not end here ………. It made my day… in those three hours.. I spent at Fatehpur …. I travelled on a horse cart .. with an horse named…..” Raadhey “..

Totally Great experience 🙂